Filed under: personal
Believe it or not, I do feel like the clown sometimes.
But lately, I’m fed up with that role. It’s very annoying when everyone expects you to be always smiling and making jokes and being happy faced.
Lately, I am happy, I am trully happy. But I don’t feel like making jokes all the time, but I do smile all the time.
I feel whole and new, complete and happy. I don’t care if i’m not always the wise-crack people expect me to be. I don’t need to do it any longer. I’m fine with laying low and not raising attention to myself. I never liked all the attention anyway.
So I’m fine, I’m happy and i’m okay.
I just don’t need to be the clown.
I’ll lay low…. but i won’t be Pierrot, the clown.
And if you’re ever around,
in the city or the suburbs,
of this town,
be sure to come around,
I’ll bewallowing in sorrow,
wearing a frown,
like pierrot the clown.Pierrot, the clown by Placebo
Filed under: loving
When you’re quiet, but your eyes
Are saying everything I need to know
I want to burrow like a sparrow
Dodging alley cats and whiskers
Why do we talk in whispers?
Is it painful hearing voices ring
So early in the morning?
I’ve been waiting for the day
When I can throw away these numbers
That line my dresser drawers and cupboards
Start me over
Life seems so much slower
With your toothbrush by the mirror
Can I make it any clearer?
And I just might say it tonight
I just might say it tonight
I just might tell you tonight
That I love you
And you should stay all my life
They’ll tell you that you’ll maybe make it
If you just cut your clothes and change your hair
But I won’t fuss and moan
’bout what you wear
I feel so much better
When I read your dirty letters
Just wear your sweaters in the winter
‘Cause I wouldn’t want you to get cold
I hope that we’re together when we’re old
I would have sold all my possessions
Never took piano lessons
But baby you’re a grand
And I will learn to play the good notes
And tune you up the best I can
And I just might say it tonight
I just might say it tonight
I just might tell you tonight
That I love you
And you should stay all my life
Might Tell You Tonight by Scissor Sisters
(Ta-Dah – 2006)
porque te amo. 
Filed under: ramblings
Even when you don’t really care about some people, they manage to disappoint you.
It doesn’t matter if you like them or not. If you get along with them or not. If you respect them or not. The moment someone is introduced to you and you talk to them a couple of times, you develop expectations. And invariably you are disapointed.
Truth is, they aren’t to blame. 98% of the times, they don’t even notice they did anything that encouraged you to develop expectations. So, you are to blame. You are human, you act like a human being.
So what if people do things that shatter your expectations and your view of them? Who cares? They don’t. And you are left to pick up the pieces. Or maybe you don’t pick up the pieces at all, simply because you don’t give a shit anymore.
But the circle starts over again with somebody else. Over and over again, human beings are social beings. Meant to be disappointed and smile anyway.
The world keeps turning, and life is beautiful anyway.
(and if you think this is about you, get a grip, you’re not that important)
